Finding contentment in letting go

A rather difficult leadership lesson as of late

I thrived in the “individual contributor” role.

I fondly reflect back on my days at the Hilti Corporate office when I operated in various roles as a business analyst and product manager. The rush and feeling I would get in building great solutions for stakeholders was truly fantastic.

Though what I didn’t appreciate was that a leadership role would severely limit those opportunities to display my brilliance on an everyday fashion.

Evolving from player to coach

I’ve closely followed both professional soccer and college football most of my life.

I sometimes start feeling slightly older when I recognize the sons of former professional players that I used to watch on television. My first realization of this was seeing Patrick Surtain II playing for the Alabama Crimson Tide. I thought to myself, “You used to play with his dad in Madden?!”

Watching professional athletes evolve throughout their career is highly fascinating to me. At times you can see where their physical skills have slightly diminished but their leadership and experience is what continues to deliver value to their organization.

My all-time favorite soccer player is Xavi Hernandez - FC Barcelona’s current head coach. Xavi was an absolute genius in midfield and a primary contributor during their golden era of dominance.

Xavi’s physical dominance began to wane toward the end of his career but it was his experience and nearly flawless leadership that continued to command him a place in the first team.

Xavi retired as captain of his club and quickly moved into coaching as he is now the coach of the Barcelona first team.

While his brilliance is now displayed on the sideline I do often wonder how much he misses playing with a group of 10 other players.

Being the player-coach in the workplace

At this stage in my own career I suppose I’m considering myself a bit of a player-coach.

I spend a lot of time on the sideline directing my team and tinkering a greater strategy to ensure ongoing success. I do however still have the skills to take off my warmup and step out onto the field to help my side.

Managing these desires to step onto the field has certainly been a struggle as of late. My time and bandwidth is simply too stretched to take the field on the daily.

This simply fact has been difficult to accept.

My ambition level continues to drive me toward wanting to be in the middle of every moving piece and fighting these urges can certainly prove difficult at time.

Don’t get me wrong, I love being in a leadership role and realizing success through the success of others but there are some days when you can begin to question your own professional self-worth.

Anybody else struggle with this?

How I am currently navigating this dynamic

Deflecting praise has never been difficult for me. I can start squirming in my seat when I’m publicly praised and rather prefer a private “job well done”.

Though any praised received for my efforts truly allows me to highlight those who actively contributed toward these moments of success. Yes, my hands were certainly in it but I gain incredible satisfaction knowing those under my leadership are also recognized for their tremendous efforts.

I’m also spending a lot of time learning from others who have or are currently navigating their own leadership evolution.

Leadership lessons are a dime a dozen and it seems that everyday I find another “expert” trying to coach society on how to become a better leader. It’s both annoying and comical.

While YouTube is filled with a ton of these self-appointed leadership experts I have found immense value in the High Performance podcast. Jake and Damian interview high-performers to learn more about their own experiences and how they have evolved into incredibly influential figures.

Finally, I’ve found immense value in learning from Jocko Willink and his guests. Military leadership, while intense, carries a wonderful amount of both good and bad lessons. The overall principle still remains constant: Convincing others to follow you into incredible uncertain situations while still maintaining belief in ultimate success.

Check out these links for both High Performance and Jocko Willink.

Closing thoughts

I’ve needed to be transparent today about this.

Lately, I’ve struggled with this realization that my player-coach role involves a lot more coaching than it does playing.

Growth and evolution are always positive and nearly always painful. I’ve felt the pain of these exercises a lot more than previously experienced.

To both encourage and caution you in your balance management of coaching vs. playing please check out this quick YouTube short - When Alex Ferguson Predicted FA Cup Glory.

Continue leading yourself and others well